Biden Narrowly Wins Argument with Trump Mannequin, Dem Strategists Say “No Need” for Further Debates
by Maxwell Paddington
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democratic strategists are urging Joe Biden not to participate in upcoming debates with President Trump citing a heated exchange between Biden and a blonde-wigged mannequin last week at an upscale D.C. shopping mall.
“Biden completely shut down the Trump mock-up,” said Alfred Zheimer, Biden’s chief political strategist. “After some initial fits and starts, he eventually got in the first and last words, proving to the nation that he does not need to debate Trump in the future.”
Zheimer also added, “The President likes to hide behind his words and actions, but as soon as you take those away… that’s when Biden starts to shine.”
Because its rude to highlight “cognitive decline” when someone’s running for president.
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An Article 107 News Publication
Article 107 of the military’s Uniform Code of Military Justice covers “False Official Statements.” As our name implies, we are a satirical site, and you shouldn’t think anything we publish is real. You should, however, mercilessly mock anyone who does. You can follow Article 107 News on Twitter at @Article107News. If you’re looking for real news, check out our sister site The Havok Journal. Or you can visit us on Facebook or follow us on Twitter at @HavokJournal.