Military Installations to be Renamed after Disney Princesses by Maxwell Paddington June 12, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. (Pentagon) -- In an effort to increase … [Read more...]
Army Unveils New, Controversial Footwear Line
Army Unveils New, Controversial Footwear Line by Hugh Jashol May 24, 2020 FORT LEE, VA -- Bowing to social justice pressure, the Army has spent $1.2 billion … [Read more...]
Commander WAY Too Excited to Play Nothing but AC/DC at Brigade Run Tomorrow
Commander WAY Too Excited to Play Nothing but AC/DC at Brigade Run Tomorrow by Hugh Jashol May 23, 2020 FORT BRAGG, NC -- According to multiple sources … [Read more...]
New Army Study Shows Chaplains are Mostly Useless
New Army Study Shows Chaplains are Mostly Useless by Hugh Jashol May 22, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Citing irrefutable evidence after years of careful data … [Read more...]
Democrats Push Bill Abolishing Military’s Physical Fitness and Height-Weight Standards, Vow No More “Fat Shaming”
Democrats Push Bill Abolishing Military's Physical Fitness and Height-Weight Standards, Vow No More "Fat Shaming" by Maxwell Paddington May 21, … [Read more...]
Top Ten Ways the Military Can Support Elizabeth Warren’s Directive to Go Green
Top Ten Ways the Military Can Support Elizabeth Warren's Directive to Go Green by Hugh Jashol May 21, 2020 On May 15th 2019, a year before before she became a … [Read more...]
Defense Department Designates Strippers, Pawn Shops, Used Car Dealers “Essential Personnel”
Defense Department Designates Strippers, Pawn Shops, Used Car Dealers "Essential Personnel" by Hugh Jashol FORT BRAGG, NC -- In a move that really surprised no … [Read more...]
After Venezuela Debacle, Silvercorp Wins Contract to Provide Army SERE Instructors
After Venezuela Debacle, Silvercorp Wins Contract to Provide Army SERE Instructors by John Chandler May 19, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Pentagon announced … [Read more...]
Army to Commission “Virtual Warrior” Officers for New “E-Sports” Branch
Army to Commission “Virtual Warrior” Officers for New “E-Sports” Branch by Hugh Jashol WASHINGTON, D.C. (Pentagon) -- Eager to capitalize on the massive … [Read more...]
Army Study: “Not Even COVID-19 Likes Fort Bragg”
Army Study: “Not Even COVID-19 Likes Fort Bragg” by Hugh Jashol May 13, 2020 FORT BRAGG, NC -- Fort Bragg, North Carolina has the lowest incidence of COVID-19 … [Read more...]
After Attack on Mercy Hospital Ship, Navy to Add “Anti-Train” Weapons Systems to All Ships
After Attack on Mercy Hospital Ship, Navy to Add “Anti-Train” Weapons Systems to All Ships by Hugh Jashol NORFOLK, VA -- After the hospital ship USNS Comfort … [Read more...]
Troops in Failed Venezuelan Coup “Must Repeat U.S. Special Forces Training”
Troops in Failed Venezuelan Coup “Must Repeat U.S. Special Forces Training” by Hugh Jashol May 8, 2020 CARACAS, VENEZUELA -- A badly botched coup attempt … [Read more...]
Fort Hood COVID Cases Exceed STD Infections for the First Time Ever, Concerning Health Officials
Fort Hood COVID Cases Exceed STD Infections for the First Time Ever, Concerning Health Officials by Hugh Jashol May 3, 2020 Reported cases of COVID-19 have … [Read more...]
Pentagon’s “Unidentified Aerial Phenomena” Determined to be “COVID Clusters” as Virus Adapts to Better Protect Itself
Pentagon's "Unidentified Aerial Phenomena" Determined to be "COVID Clusters" as Virus Adapts to Better Protect Itself by Maxwell Paddington April 29, … [Read more...]
Army to Fight COVID with Reflective Belts
Army to Fight COVID with Reflective Belts by Hugh Jashol FORT MEADE, MD (Army Public Affairs Center) -- The Army, always the slowest of all the armed services to … [Read more...]
Army’s New “AIM 3.0” Assignment Process Only has Options for Ft. Polk and Ft. Bliss
Army's New "AIM 3.0" Assignment Process Only has Options for Ft. Polk and Ft. Bliss By John Chandler March 23, 2020 FORT KNOX, KY - Leaders from the Army’s … [Read more...]
Lawsuits vs. Military Spouses Surge as the Dependapotamus Competes with Cro-Dependas for Resources
Lawsuits vs. Military Spouses Surge as the Dependapotamus Competes with Cro-Dependas for Resources by Untactic Al February 11, 2020 Newly minted Army male … [Read more...]
U.S. Navy Arms Submarines with Lasers to Counteract “Sharks with freaking laser beams on their heads.”
U.S. Navy Arms Submarines with Lasers to Counteract "Sharks with freaking laser beams on their heads." by Untactic Al February 7, 2020 According to a recent … [Read more...]
Archeologists Discover Ancient Roman S.H.A.R.P. Program had Mixed Results
Archeologists Discover Ancient Roman S.H.A.R.P. Program had Mixed Results by Untactic Al February 6, 2020. In late 2019 Italian archaeologists uncovered a … [Read more...]
USAF Leaders Impeached Following Recent Command Climate Survey
USAF Leaders Impeached Following Recent Command Climate Survey by Untactic Al February 3, 2020 JOINT BASE LANGLEY-EUSTIS, VA (1st Fighter Wing) - Shockwaves … [Read more...]
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