Surgeon General Issues New Warning: Quitting U.S. News Media Now Greatly Reduces Serious Risks to Your Health by Maxwell Paddington June 25, 2020 WASHINGTON, … [Read More]
New Articles
Trump Designates U.S. News Organizations as Foreign Missions
Trump Designates U.S. News Organizations as Foreign Missions by Maxwell Paddington June 23, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Trump administration announced on … [Read More]
U.S. Military Bases to be Renamed after Disney Princesses
Military Installations to be Renamed after Disney Princesses by Maxwell Paddington June 12, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. (Pentagon) -- In an effort to increase … [Read More]
Democrats Accused of Cultural Appropriation by “Insomniacs,” a New Far Left Movement
Democrats Accused of Cultural Appropriation by "Insomniacs," a New Far Left Movement by Maxwell Paddington June 10, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, Nancy … [Read More]
Religious Services Now Permitted, After Identifying as “Social Justice Protests”
Religious Services Now Permitted, After Identifying as "Social Justice Protests" by Hugh Jashol June 8, 2020 TAMPA, FL -- It seems like just a few short weeks … [Read More]
2020 U.S. Census Abolishes Racial Demographics, Replaces “Race” with “American”
2020 U.S. Census Abolishes Racial Demographics, Replaces "Race" with "American" by Maxwell Paddington June 8, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a landmark decision, … [Read More]
Mr. Biggles Revealed as “Defund the Police” Mastermind, Part of Plan to Install Adorable Fascist Regime
Mr. Biggles Revealed as "Defund the Police" Mastermind, Part of Plan to Install Adorable Fascist Regime by Maxwell Paddington June 7, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- … [Read More]
As India Curries U.S. Favor, Chinese Takeout Military Action along Contested Border
As India Curries U.S. Favor, Chinese Takeout Military Action along Contested Border by Maxwell Paddington May 27, 2020 LADAKH, INDIA -- Earlier this month, … [Read More]
Supreme Court Designates Straight White Males a Protected Group
Supreme Court Designates Straight White Males a Protected Group by Maxwell Paddington June 5, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, the Supreme Court ruled 9-0 … [Read More]
World Health Organization Acknowledges “Violent Rioting” Totally Cures COVID-19, NC Public Health Officials Demonstrate Proper Self-Application
World Health Organization Acknowledges "Violent Rioting" Totally Cures COVID-19, NC Public Health Officials Demonstrate Proper Self-Application by Hugh … [Read More]
More Great Articles
Supreme Court Designates Straight White Males a Protected Group
Supreme Court Designates Straight White Males a Protected Group by Maxwell Paddington June 5, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, the Supreme Court ruled 9-0 designating straight white males a "protected group". A protected group or protected class is a … [Read More]
World Health Organization Acknowledges “Violent Rioting” Totally Cures COVID-19, NC Public Health Officials Demonstrate Proper Self-Application
World Health Organization Acknowledges "Violent Rioting" Totally Cures COVID-19, NC Public Health Officials Demonstrate Proper Self-Application by Hugh Jashol June 2, 2020 GENEVA, SWITZERLAND -- It turned out that the cure was right in front of us, all … [Read More]
Minneapolis Mayor Limits Looters to 25 Per Store, Citing COVID Concerns
Minneapolis Mayor Limits Looters to 25 Per Store, Citing COVID Concerns by Hugh Jashol (Minneapolis, MN) Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey announced today that while rioting, looting, arson, and murder would be allowed to continue unchecked in his city, local … [Read More]
Mississippi Mayor Resigns Amid Outrage Over George Floyd Comments, “I will always surrender to the mob mentality”
Mississippi Mayor Resigns Amid Outrage Over George Floyd Comments, "I will always surrender to the mob mentality" by Maxwell Paddington May 29, 2020 PETAL, Miss. -- Hal Marx, mayor of Petal, Mississippi, accepted calls for his resignation after he made … [Read More]
Pro-Police Demonstrations Erupt in Minneapolis and Los Angeles, Showcase Life without Law Enforcement
Pro-Police Demonstrations Erupt in Minneapolis and Los Angeles, Showcase Life without Law Enforcement by Maxwell Paddington May 28, 2020 MINNEAPOLIS, MN – Pro-police demonstrations highlighting law enforcement's vital role in society took place … [Read More]
As India Curries U.S. Favor, Chinese Takeout Military Action along Contested Border
As India Curries U.S. Favor, Chinese Takeout Military Action along Contested Border by Maxwell Paddington May 27, 2020 LADAKH, INDIA -- Earlier this month, 150 Indian and Chinese soldiers fought over disputed territories in the Pangong Tso lake and Naku … [Read More]
TMZ & National Enquirer Get White House Press Corps Passes, Trump Retweets “Truth Bombs”
TMZ & National Enquirer Get White House Press Corps Passes, Trump Retweets "Truth Bombs" by Maxwell Paddington May 26, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Tabloid news website TMZ (Thirty Mile Zone) and National Enquirer became members of the White House press … [Read More]
Biden Again Denies ’93 Tara Reade Assault, Insists He was “giving directions to the Capitol subway”
Biden Again Denies '93 Tara Reade Assault, Insists He was "giving directions to the Capitol subway" by Maxwell Paddington May 25, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Joe Biden released another statement Friday denying Tara Reade's claims he sexually assaulted her … [Read More]
Army Unveils New, Controversial Footwear Line
Army Unveils New, Controversial Footwear Line by Hugh Jashol May 24, 2020 FORT LEE, VA -- Bowing to social justice pressure, the Army has spent $1.2 billion dollars revamping its uniform line to be more "gender-neutral." "Women in the Army are … [Read More]
Commander WAY Too Excited to Play Nothing but AC/DC at Brigade Run Tomorrow
Commander WAY Too Excited to Play Nothing but AC/DC at Brigade Run Tomorrow by Hugh Jashol May 23, 2020 FORT BRAGG, NC -- According to multiple sources within the ranks of the storied and battle-hardened 82nd Airborne Division, the commander of the … [Read More]
