Biden Narrowly Wins Argument with Trump Mannequin, Dem Strategists Say "No Need" for Further Debates by Maxwell Paddington WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Democratic … [Read more...]
Biden “Gaffes” Decoded by NSA, Determined to be Family Recipe for Delicious Word Salad
Biden "Gaffes" Decoded by NSA, Determined to be Family Recipe for Delicious Word Salad by Maxwell Paddington WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Wednesday, former VP Joe Biden … [Read more...]
At Last! The World is Finally Awokening to Cancel Culture
At Last! The World is Finally Awokening to Cancel Culture by Untactic Al Due to the outrage of a small percentage of the world population over certain historical … [Read more...]
The Most American Thing You’ll See All Week
The Most American Thing You'll See All Week by Hugh Jashol July 1, 2020 WASHINGTON D.C. - The Fourth of July is upon us, and with it, a whole lot of #America. … [Read more...]
Surgeon General Issues New Warning: Quitting U.S. News Media Now Greatly Reduces Serious Risks to Your Health
Surgeon General Issues New Warning: Quitting U.S. News Media Now Greatly Reduces Serious Risks to Your Health by Maxwell Paddington June 25, 2020 WASHINGTON, … [Read more...]
U.S. Military Bases to be Renamed after Disney Princesses
Military Installations to be Renamed after Disney Princesses by Maxwell Paddington June 12, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. (Pentagon) -- In an effort to increase … [Read more...]
Democrats Accused of Cultural Appropriation by “Insomniacs,” a New Far Left Movement
Democrats Accused of Cultural Appropriation by "Insomniacs," a New Far Left Movement by Maxwell Paddington June 10, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, Nancy … [Read more...]
2020 U.S. Census Abolishes Racial Demographics, Replaces “Race” with “American”
2020 U.S. Census Abolishes Racial Demographics, Replaces "Race" with "American" by Maxwell Paddington June 8, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a landmark decision, … [Read more...]
Mr. Biggles Revealed as “Defund the Police” Mastermind, Part of Plan to Install Adorable Fascist Regime
Mr. Biggles Revealed as "Defund the Police" Mastermind, Part of Plan to Install Adorable Fascist Regime by Maxwell Paddington June 7, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- … [Read more...]
Supreme Court Designates Straight White Males a Protected Group
Supreme Court Designates Straight White Males a Protected Group by Maxwell Paddington June 5, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, the Supreme Court ruled 9-0 … [Read more...]
World Health Organization Acknowledges “Violent Rioting” Totally Cures COVID-19, NC Public Health Officials Demonstrate Proper Self-Application
World Health Organization Acknowledges "Violent Rioting" Totally Cures COVID-19, NC Public Health Officials Demonstrate Proper Self-Application by Hugh … [Read more...]
Minneapolis Mayor Limits Looters to 25 Per Store, Citing COVID Concerns
Minneapolis Mayor Limits Looters to 25 Per Store, Citing COVID Concerns by Hugh Jashol (Minneapolis, MN) Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey announced today that while … [Read more...]
Mississippi Mayor Resigns Amid Outrage Over George Floyd Comments, “I will always surrender to the mob mentality”
Mississippi Mayor Resigns Amid Outrage Over George Floyd Comments, "I will always surrender to the mob mentality" by Maxwell Paddington May 29, 2020 PETAL, … [Read more...]
Pro-Police Demonstrations Erupt in Minneapolis and Los Angeles, Showcase Life without Law Enforcement
Pro-Police Demonstrations Erupt in Minneapolis and Los Angeles, Showcase Life without Law Enforcement by Maxwell Paddington May 28, 2020 MINNEAPOLIS, MN – … [Read more...]
As India Curries U.S. Favor, Chinese Takeout Military Action along Contested Border
As India Curries U.S. Favor, Chinese Takeout Military Action along Contested Border by Maxwell Paddington May 27, 2020 LADAKH, INDIA -- Earlier this month, … [Read more...]
TMZ & National Enquirer Get White House Press Corps Passes, Trump Retweets “Truth Bombs”
TMZ & National Enquirer Get White House Press Corps Passes, Trump Retweets "Truth Bombs" by Maxwell Paddington May 26, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Tabloid … [Read more...]
Biden Again Denies ’93 Tara Reade Assault, Insists He was “giving directions to the Capitol subway”
Biden Again Denies '93 Tara Reade Assault, Insists He was "giving directions to the Capitol subway" by Maxwell Paddington May 25, 2020 WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Joe … [Read more...]
Army Unveils New, Controversial Footwear Line
Army Unveils New, Controversial Footwear Line by Hugh Jashol May 24, 2020 FORT LEE, VA -- Bowing to social justice pressure, the Army has spent $1.2 billion … [Read more...]
Commander WAY Too Excited to Play Nothing but AC/DC at Brigade Run Tomorrow
Commander WAY Too Excited to Play Nothing but AC/DC at Brigade Run Tomorrow by Hugh Jashol May 23, 2020 FORT BRAGG, NC -- According to multiple sources … [Read more...]
Heroes Battle “Injustice League of Woke America” in Zack Snyder’s New Director’s Cut
Heroes Battle "Injustice League of Woke America" in Zack Snyder's New Director's Cut by Maxwell Paddington May 22, 2020 HOLLYWOOD, C.A. -- Film director Zack … [Read more...]
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