Joe Biden is the “Hands On” Leader America Needs in 2020
by Hugh Jashol
April 30, 2020
WASHINGTON, D.C. — With every other serious competitor for the Democratic nomination now out of the picture, former Vice President Joe Biden is the all-but-certain Democratic Party candidate for U.S. President in 2020. And that makes total sense: after all, who better to take over for a president who said he “could” grab women by the p**sy, than someone who actually did it?
From girl-grabbing, to leg-hair-petting, to women-hair-sniffing, lily-white and old-male Biden seems an odd choice for the party that prides itself as the party of youth and “diversity.” And with his (lack of) cognitive ability on full-and-cringy display, Biden’s knack for sticking his foot in his mouth—and his fingers in other people—is sure to be an issue in the general election.
Nonetheless, Democrats and liberal celebrities are setting aside all of their values and lining up to offer their support for Biden’s candidacy… which is good because he’s going to need it.
Article 107 of the military’s Uniform Code of Military Justice covers “False Official Statements.” As our name implies, we are a satirical site, and you shouldn’t think anything we publish is real. You should, however, mercilessly mock anyone who does. You can follow Article 107 News on Twitter at @Article107News. If you’re looking for real news, check out our sister site The Havok Journal. Or you can visit us on Facebook or follow us on Twitter at @HavokJournal.
And you should definitely check out the difference in reactions of liberals to the sex assault allegations against Biden compared to… well, any conservative.
An Article 107 News Publication
Article 107 of the military’s Uniform Code of Military Justice covers “False Official Statements.” As our name implies, we are a satirical site, and you shouldn’t think anything we publish is real. You should, however, mercilessly mock anyone who does. You can follow Article 107 News on Twitter at @Article107News. If you’re looking for real news, check out our sister site The Havok Journal. Or you can visit us on Facebook or follow us on Twitter at @HavokJournal.